You know you are in Pennsylvania when:
The first day of Buck season and the first day of Doe season are school holidays.
You own only three spices "salt, pepper, and Heinz ketchup".
Driving is always better in winter because the potholes are filled with snow.
Words like "hoagie", "crick", "chipped ham", and "pop" actually mean something to you.
You can use the phrase "fire hall wedding reception" and not even bat an eye.
You constantly refer to Pennsylvania as "PA" (pronounced Pee-ay). How many other states do that?
You know that Blue Ball, Intercourse, Climax, Bird-in-Hand, Beaver, Moon, Virginville, Paradise, Mars, and Slippery Rock are PA towns.
Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.
You measure distance in hours.
You know several people who have hit deer more than once.
You often switch from "Heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend or wife knows how to use them.
You can actually eat cold pizza (even for breakfast) and know others who do the same. (Those from NY find this "barbaric".)
You not only have heard of Birch Beer, but you know that it comes in several colors: Red, White, Brown, Gold.
At least 5 people on your block have electric "candles" in all or most of their windows all year long.
You know what a "State Store" is, and your out of state friends find it incredulous that you can't purchase liquor at the mini-mart.
You can't go to a Pennsylvania wedding without hearing the "Chicken Dance" and at least 5 Polkas.
You live for summer, when street fairs signal the beginning of funnel cake season.
You ask the waitress for "dippy eggs" for breakfast.
Your turkey has "filling," or "stuffing," and most certainly, NOT "dressing."
You actually understand these jokes and send them onto other Pennsylvanians.
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Created November 16, 2002